My Commitment to Service

Today, at the Peace Corps office, we had a session titled “Commitment to Service.”  All fifty-two of us sat in a huge circle and shared our sentiments regarding our commitment to service in the Peace Corps.  Many of my friends had beautiful and heartfelt things to say, and I was on the verge of tears several times throughout the session.  I had a million things I wanted to say, but I was so close to crying that I opted for a simple story about the moment I realized that my integration into my host community might be more natural and easy than I thought.  After I spoke, I continued to think about my commitment to my Peace Corps service and why I know that I will still be here two years from now.

Let me start at the beginning.  I’ve been a very lucky person and I feel blessed to have had the experiences that I have.  I grew up in a relatively wealthy family and I was given the opportunity to travel the world starting at a young age.  My travels often took me off the beaten path, where I was able to experience first-hand many distinct cultures.  As a thirteen-year-old, I taught mathematics in a school in Zambia when the teacher failed to show up for work.  At fifteen, I walked through the favellas in Sao Paolo, Brazil, and later that year discovered the mysteries of the labyrinthine souks of Marrakech, Morocco.  Five years ago I spent time by myself exploring the streets of Paris, and not long after that I traveled to Moscow and St. Petersburg and experienced Russian culture first-hand.  Last year I had another opportunity to explore Russia by myself, and I also spent some time wandering around the Polish countryside.  During my travels, I had the opportunity to see how people live, both rich and poor, in many distinct regions of the world.  These experiences fostered in me a deep interest in the way the world works – politically, economically, and socially.

In college, I studied political science and peace and conflict studies.  I believe that studying global conflict is central to the study of political science.  When one studies history and political science, one inevitably studies the history of conflicts, their sources, reasons, and rationalizations.  I focused most of my academic attention on studying post-conflict regions and the nation-building that was (or was not) taking place after such conflicts.  I wrote my thesis on the current nation-building efforts in Rwanda, however I also spent a semester studying the civil war and genocide in Guatemala.  My interest in this region brought me to Guatemala in 2008 with a group of students from Haverford College and our professor Anita Isaacs.  We spent time with an NGO that was started by a Haverford College Alum, and I was offered a position to come to Guatemala after my graduation to spend a year running the Guatemalan part of the organization.  After graduation, I found out that my housing option In Santiago Atitlán had fallen through.  At the same time, I was grasping on to the last threads of a failing relationship.  I used my loss of housing as an excuse not to go to Guatemala.  Deep down, I blamed my then-boyfriend for my not following my dream of working abroad in a post-conflict society.  This brought about the end of our relationship.

Two years later, I found myself on the verge of going into the Peace Corps.  I was also in a very happy, strong relationship with someone who I still consider the love of my life.  In March 2011, I received my invitation to serve in Guatemala.  I need to take a moment here to say that I’m not a very religious person, and I don’t consider myself a “believer,”  I do, however, believe that I was invited to serve in Guatemala for a reason.  I never told anyone in Peace Corps about my previous opportunity in Guatemala, yet this is where I ended up.  This was my second chance to prove to myself that I am strong enough to put my life and my relationships on hold so that I can serve the people of this incredible country.  Leaving home was heartbreaking, as I was (and still am) unsure of the future of my relationship.  I, however, know from experience that if I hadn’t come to Guatemala, I would have blamed him and it would have ultimately killed our relationship.  Not one day goes by that I don’t think of him, however I have never once thought of going home.

I am in Guatemala because I need to be here.  This is my path, and if I don’t follow it I will regret it for the rest of my life.  I am committed to bettering myself through service to those who need it.  I am committed to the goals and the cause of the Peace Corps.  I am committed to living outside my comfort level so that I may help others.  I am committed to furthering the education and life-skills of Guatemalan youth.  I am committed to Peace Corps service.

I’m also stubborn as hell, and there’s no way I’m going home before my two years are up.